today i'm going to unapply (is that a word?) for a job in dc. and hoping it wont be a big mistake. i applied because the go-getter in me is ready for this promotion. but, what i didn't consider was the daydreamer in me.
i have always been an expert at day dreaming. i build time into my schedule in hopes that i will avoid being late because who knows when my brain will decide to take a lil trip. sometimes my mind will fill with so many ideas i feel like my head is going to explode. this year i promised i would try to make some of these dreams come true. i finally started working in earnest on my fashion line. (check me out @reconstructpd . pics will be up soon!) i'm working on building arts programming with a non profit (@csbc ) even got myself a fancy title as the director of arts and community outreach. trying to give the people of baltimore a chance to reach for the stars. and hey look at me...blogging. my third goal for the year.
but, i also have a real life job. one that i'm very good at and enjoy. which is amazing. and it's natural for me to want to succeed. i just feel like the two hour commute will leave only time for dreaming and take away time from making the dreams a reality. i guess what i'm doing is taking a chance on myself.
and really.....who else should you take a chance on?
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Friday, August 12, 2011
the man, the myth, the legend
Is John Legend the most romantic man alive? I think so. If he's not.... don't tell me for goodness sakes. This week two of his songs have been in my head.
http://youtu.be/c3FDGviwiJo
Sadly, right now I sing this to my cats.
And then there's this:
http://youtu.be/6jkfVBTNdDM
Chrissy Teigan you are one lucky girl!
Does anyone even slow dance anymore ?
http://youtu.be/c3FDGviwiJo
Sadly, right now I sing this to my cats.
And then there's this:
http://youtu.be/6jkfVBTNdDM
Chrissy Teigan you are one lucky girl!
Does anyone even slow dance anymore ?
Thursday, August 4, 2011
fast no more
the time was 2:30. i just couldn't do it any longer. i would be having a normal conversation and suddenly blurt out "i'm hungry!". i think i was beginning to scare people. and myself.
i do feel proud of the days i was able to fast and think i can use this as a reboot of sorts for my life. i will continue the no smoking thing because wellllll it just makes sense. i will continue my early morning prayer/meditation because it kept me centered all day. i also will continue to fight my food addiction. now that i've proven to myself that food does not equal happiness!
this is all just part of my journey to be a better, healthier person. hmmmmm, maybe juice fast next?
i wish all of those who are participating in Ramadan lots of love and luck. i thank the ones i know personally who supported me and allowed me to share just a bit of their religion and culture.
i do feel proud of the days i was able to fast and think i can use this as a reboot of sorts for my life. i will continue the no smoking thing because wellllll it just makes sense. i will continue my early morning prayer/meditation because it kept me centered all day. i also will continue to fight my food addiction. now that i've proven to myself that food does not equal happiness!
this is all just part of my journey to be a better, healthier person. hmmmmm, maybe juice fast next?
i wish all of those who are participating in Ramadan lots of love and luck. i thank the ones i know personally who supported me and allowed me to share just a bit of their religion and culture.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
challenge
today was rough. it started out this morning when i realized i slept through my "get up, eat and pray" alarm. the power was out on my block....i just had a general feeling of blah. i couldn't meditate because it was so hot so i just layed around until my afternoon shift.
i was looking forward to breaking my fast with the Muslim crew at work. but, i felt like an imposter so i went to eat by myself. i did try a date though, it was better than i thought.
hopefully i will be back on track tomorrow. all in all i am enjoying the clarity this experience is bringing even though i do feel a bit lonely without my vices.
i was looking forward to breaking my fast with the Muslim crew at work. but, i felt like an imposter so i went to eat by myself. i did try a date though, it was better than i thought.
hopefully i will be back on track tomorrow. all in all i am enjoying the clarity this experience is bringing even though i do feel a bit lonely without my vices.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
"you know you're not Muslim right?"
so glad to be home from work! today was a real challenge. i work at Whole foods Market, the land of the free sample. i cannot tell you how many times i reached for a chip that was just sitting there waiting to be eaten. but, i did it! i did take strolls past the meat and seafood depts though.....just eating with my eyes
some of my friends don't understand why i'm doing this (and to be honest i lost the reason a couple times today). what they don't know is that for the last couple months i have felt this weight, this ball of stress that was just getting bigger and bigger. i was losing focus and control over my emotions. which for an Aquarius is totally unacceptable! my co-worker and i started talking and she explained the basics of Ramadan. A former Muslim, she had planned on participating and told me how focused and at peace you become during this month. i talked to some other people and they said the same thing. i also thought this month would help me turn away from my three vices .....alcohol, cigarettes and food.
some of my friends don't understand why i'm doing this (and to be honest i lost the reason a couple times today). what they don't know is that for the last couple months i have felt this weight, this ball of stress that was just getting bigger and bigger. i was losing focus and control over my emotions. which for an Aquarius is totally unacceptable! my co-worker and i started talking and she explained the basics of Ramadan. A former Muslim, she had planned on participating and told me how focused and at peace you become during this month. i talked to some other people and they said the same thing. i also thought this month would help me turn away from my three vices .....alcohol, cigarettes and food.
day 2 of the christian does ramadan
yawn... one day completed! last night i broke my fast with popeye's chicken (hey that's what the roomie got for din). i really expected to pig out but my stomach was full very quickly. i just had a large breakfast (casserole) in hopes i will be okay at work today. tonight i gotta get some veggies in my system!
for my spiritual reading i'm focusing on the Book of Psalms. it's always been uplifting. i also want to be better at meditating...my mind just wanders so much! today i really focused on deep cleansing breathes and that seemed to help.
time for more meditation and a quick nap before work. did i mention i work in a grocery store? Lord be with me!!!
for my spiritual reading i'm focusing on the Book of Psalms. it's always been uplifting. i also want to be better at meditating...my mind just wanders so much! today i really focused on deep cleansing breathes and that seemed to help.
time for more meditation and a quick nap before work. did i mention i work in a grocery store? Lord be with me!!!
Monday, August 1, 2011
6:14
so far i have spent the day writing, reading, praying and meditating. i just had a moment of weakness where i was like "forget this" but i will continue! sunset is at 8:14
i just read this awesome post by Food Republic:
http://www.foodrepublic.com/2011/08/01/5-myths-and-facts-about-ramadan-fasting?utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social-media&utm_campaign=tweet. i will begin preparing my meal at 7:45.
It made me feel bad about my offhand statement about the bologna sandwich. i don't want to offend anyone or make light of this wonderful holiday. i have already received two unexpected blessings today. i feel that being more in tune with my higher power is the cause.
i just read this awesome post by Food Republic:
http://www.foodrepublic.com/2011/08/01/5-myths-and-facts-about-ramadan-fasting?utm_source=twitter.com&utm_medium=social-media&utm_campaign=tweet. i will begin preparing my meal at 7:45.
It made me feel bad about my offhand statement about the bologna sandwich. i don't want to offend anyone or make light of this wonderful holiday. i have already received two unexpected blessings today. i feel that being more in tune with my higher power is the cause.
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